standing in the rain

it’s raining today. and it’s chilly. but i don’t mind. i have the door to my screened porch open, and i’m sitting in my kitchen, writing this. i can hear the rain falling on the roof. the soft sounds of it hitting leaves and branches and falling on the earth. i have the sound of benedictine monks chanting, coming from my beloved iTunes. i have a mug of green tea, with plenty of agave and lemon, and i couldn’t be happier.

the love of my life is here, my kids are asleep, i have a roof over my head, food in the fridge, a job, and people who love and care for me. i have people i love and care for.

i am grateful.

i am humbled.

i am alive.

i was outside this morning, before the dawn, standing barefoot in the rain. i could feel the Mother’s touch in every drop. Her blessing and restoration pouring over me. the cold, wet earth beneath my feet was soggy, and soft, giving way with every step.

i am grateful.

i am humbled.

i am alive.

as i stood underneath the great oak tree in my back yard, in the rain, in his arms, under the darkness of the new moon, it felt very much a sacred space. not to be intruded upon by the likes of mere reality. his eyes, staring at me in a way that makes my knees go weak and my heart beat a little faster. his hand, that hold me up when i’m most weak. this soul, intertwined with mine...

i am grateful.

i am humbled.

i am alive.

there aren’t sufficient words, not in my vocabulary, to describe today. things are slowly beginning to come full circle. there is a peace and a hope that haven’t been there for a while. in the words of Ellie Arroway...’Some celestial event. No - no words. No words to describe it. Poetry! They should've sent a poet. So beautiful. So beautiful... I had no idea. ‘

i am grateful.

i am humbled.

i am alive.